


starfire

by passionsfruit



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Canon Compliant, Explicit Sexual Content, Flashbacks, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Loss of Virginity, Love Confessions, M/M, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Sappy Ending, Smut, Vanilla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-06-22 05:26:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19660744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/passionsfruit/pseuds/passionsfruit
Summary: Chan knows he is in love with Jeongin, has known for a long time, but Jeongin guards his emotions.





	starfire

**Author's Note:**

> we die like men

"Don't stare, hyung," Jeongin laughs. He smiles wide, stars twinkling in his eyes.

Chan shakes his head. He is unable to resist when Chan swears he has been wrapped in starfire in these moments. The heat between them burns hot and the way the younger man shines is just short of blinding, but Chan is far too enchanted by how remarkable Jeongin is to care.

They're both bare as they were when the universe breathed life into them with Chan between Jeongin's legs. Jeongin, still bashful as ever, curls into himself in a fruitless attempt at hiding the most intimate parts of himself. It is as if moments earlier, Jeongin was not whispering Chan's name like a prayer while the older man worked his body open with practiced ease.

"But you're so nice to look at," Chan counters, returning Jeongin's smile with one of his own.

Chan is unable to pinpoint the moment in which adorable, boyish Jeongin turned to sharp, handsome _man_ Jeongin. He thought it might have been when the younger got his braces removed, but something so small could not warrant such a change. Nevertheless, somewhere along the line, Jeongin stopped being someone Chan considered his kid or little brother. Jeongin grew and grew and grew so perfectly into his features. He became someone Chan wanted to kiss until he was breathless and his lips no longer felt like they were his own.

"I know," Jeongin jokes, but Chan is sure he cannot understand.

It is impossible that Jeongin knows how alluring he is, especially when he wanted Chan this way. The hungry glint in Jeongin's eye, the playful stubbornness, Jeongin's lip caught between his teeth, and the way Jeongin writhed when want clawed away under his skin until it was unbearable sparked something indescribable in Chan. It was lust, but it was also adoration and love and gratefulness and a million other brilliant things.

"You're unbelievable," Chan sighs lightheartedly, placing his palms on Jeongin's knees and spreading them. Chan doubts he will ever get accustomed to seeing Jeongin like this. He suspects the feeling is mutual, given how Jeongin's eyes periodically rake over Chan's toned body.

"You ever gonna get to fucking me?" Jeongin quirks an eyebrow and smirks. He likes to challenge the older, likes the push and pull of it.

"Maybe not."

And if Chan was not as desperate as he is, he might let their game go on longer, but Jeongin has far too much of a hold on him. He never considered himself an impatient person until he got Jeongin in his bed like this.

×××

_"Chan hyung," Jeongin said, expression serious. He'd sat Chan on the edge of his bed with the preface of having something serious to talk to him about. Jeongin bounced his leg wordlessly for a while before Chan spoke up._

_"Hey, are you ok–"_

_In the split second that Chan's lips puckered around his last word, Jeongin managed to swoop in and kiss him. Chan blinked, once, twice, three times before he pinned Jeongin down and kissed him with the force of years worth of pent up attraction._

_"I want you to touch me, hyung. I've wanted it so badly."_

_After that night, they never talked about where they stood. They did, however, find each other where no one could see them. Grinding against each other in a bathroom tucked away backstage until they were left with a mess to clean up, unpracticed handjobs late into the night, and Jeongin learning how to take all of Chan's cock into his mouth at once was their new normal._

_They first had sex after their music show win. Chan was on a high and Jeongin seemed to be too when he pulled him into his bed. Jeongin slotted their lips together messily, tugging lightly at Chan's hair when the older sucked on his tongue._

_"Fuck me," Jeongin sighed into Chan's mouth._

_"Shit–they'll hear and you've never–I don't want to hurt you," Chan protested, cock twitching in betrayal. It was his duty as leader to be responsible and set a good example for everyone, especially the younger members, but a lapful of Jeongin asking to be fucked was enough to destroy any semblance of resolve he had._

_"Don't care. I need you so bad, Chan."_

_Chan could not have cared less about honorifics in that moment. The way his name poured like honey from Jeongin's lips and the barely there yet steady grind of their hips together clouded all of Chan's thoughts._

_When Chan finally gave Jeongin what he wanted, they were both much too loud. Jeongin was tight enough to teeter between being too much and just right. He took Chan's cock so well, practically begging for more as his orgasm approached. Chan was in no better shape, moaning into the crook of Jeongin's neck as he snapped his hips up harder, faster._

_The image of Jeongin's body winding itself up tight only to completely slump against Chan when he came hot and thick across their bodies wouldn't leave Chan for a long time after that night._

_And if the others heard Chan cry out Jeongin's name as he spilled into the condom, no one mentioned it._

_×××_

Chan uncaps a bottle of lube to slick himself up, but Jeongin lightly swats away Chan's open palm to let the cool substance pool in his hands instead. Jeongin warms it to the best of his ability before wrapping his fingers around Chan's cock. The sight has Chan hissing as pleasure licks up his spine.

When Jeongin deems him ready, he settles back into the pillows, adjusting the one under his hips. Chan searches Jeongin's eyes for confirmation before pushing in and the younger nods with a smile.

Jeongin sighs contentedly when Chan is nestled fully inside him. His chest flutters with the effort of remembering to breathe while stuffed full in the best possible way. Jeongin's eyebrow pinch together and his muscles tense briefly as Chan starts to grind into him.

"Good?" Chan asks, pressing his lips to Jeongin's neck.

"Yeah," Jeongin breathes. He gulps when Chan starts to really move, pulling out until only the head of his cock is past Jeongin's rim and sliding back in with agonizingly slow strokes. "More–s _hit–_ need more."

Chan hums, digs his fingers into Jeongin's waist, and snaps his hips into Jeongin _hard_. The younger keens between puffs of air and Chan thinks he could listen to the sounds for ages: skin slapping against skin, the symphony of moans, and the low creek of the bed frame as Chan fucks into Jeongin with purpose.

Chan knows Jeongin's body well enough to have his cock brushing against the younger's prostate with every thrust after a few minutes. Jeongin's muscles clamp tighter around Chan in am addictive heat as Jeongin loses the last of his control.

"Hyung. _Hyung, Chan, Chris,"_ Jeongin babbles, arms pulling Chan impossibly closer to his body. "I love you so much."

And that ignites something deep within Chan that has his hips stuttering. He tries to reel himself back in, make this last just a bit longer, but Jeongin _loves_ him. They have never talked about _feelings_ before. Chan knows he is in love with Jeongin, has known for a long time, but Jeongin guards his emotions.

"Oh, fuck," Chan whimpers, voice coming out as dazed as he feels. It would be far more embarrassing if he were anything other than over the moon about this. "Jeongin. God, I love you too. So much."

"Gonna cum," Jeongin cries, squirming in Chan's arms. Jeongin's back bows and he lets out a nearly incoherent string of words as he cums. Amongst the curses and half words, Chan hears what sends him over the edge. _"Always loved you."_

The knot in his stomach, the buzz under his skin, and the warmth enveloping his entire body crest as Chan's orgasm tears through him.

His nerves tingle and his head swims with pure pleasure for what feels like ages. He only thinks to pull out when Jeongin whines at his weight crushing him. Chan rolls off of Jeongin's spent body and pulls him into his chest to spoon.

"Did you mean it?" Chan is torn between wanting the truth and fearing it. There is no right answer and they both know it. If Jeongin really did not mean it, he will break Chan's heart and they will have to stop messing around. If he did, dating would be near impossible. They are idols in the same group and they are not meant to date at all, let alone date other men.

Jeongin rolls over to face Chan, pupils shaking when their gazes meet. This is what Jeongin has been avoiding, Chan realizes: being vulnerable.

"I did," he says without hesitation. "I really do love you, Channie hyung."

There is something amazing and calming about Jeongin remaining confident in his feelings even when he is clearly terrified. Chan falls in love just a bit more.

"Thank God," Chan laughs, holding Jeongin tighter. Jeongin visibly relaxes and Chan feels his heart flutter. "Because I am so in love with you, Jeongin. I want you to be my boyfriend."

Maybe they _are_ in the wrong business to be together and maybe they _are_ taking a huge risk, but Chan has never felt more sure of anything in his life. He loves Jeongin enough to risk what he has spent years building.

"I want that too, hyung."

And the kiss they share tastes like home.

**Author's Note:**

> well...i regret nothing.


End file.
